How could one be unhappy on this island? and to a certain extend, on this planet?
Taking anything for granted is the biggest mistake one can do. If everything really started with a Big Bang, then everything could end the same way. And no one could explain. If there is no origin to what we call the origin, if we have to accept that we all started with a bang (well, we did; didn’t we ..?), everything might as well disappear just as it appeared.
In the society I belong to, we always look forward to any kind of escape from our daily occupation; despite the fact that we might love what we do. The energy circulating in our society might be thrilling sometimes, but let us remember that at the end of the day it is everything but natural. We lose ourselves in a made up system which alienates our senses and thoughts. We might not have full conscious of this, as we progress in our daily function; but once we disconnect from the sphere we were thrown in comes a time for realization. Especially if we have enough time to connect to nature – we realize how small our social achievements are.
It is easy to let those thoughts go, play and dance into my mind. Because from where I stand, lay, hang, eat, float… everything is peace and beauty. Under water, on the surface, on boats, on land, on the slippery rocks, on the burning sand, in the shadow and upside down in a handstand : life is sweet, relaxing, energizing and rewarding.
The sun wakes me up for my morning yoga practice. I did not get a lot of sleep for the last three nights. Storms here are a show you do not want to miss. The structure of my hut would not let me anyways. In unison, my heart, my bed and the windows of the bamboo hut are shaking as the thunders burst.
I am going to miss this sky. Deeply blue as long the sun dominates; turning pink as the moon makes an entrance; pulling off that dark black giving the stars all the room to shine; breaking into pieces before a new peaceful day rises. Dramatic and splendid, like an opera playing every day without losing any of its magic.
In every place I visited, I have learned. One of the most valuable life lessons I am bringing back hone with me is the one I had over the last few days. How to equilibrate. Observing and experiencing other cultures has enlightened the limits of the one I call mine. But it still is mine, and knowing it better does not make me want to reject it. I just want to be able to be at peace within it. Knowing me better will lead this process to success. To come to a perfect balance between the outer world and my inner self, I am working on yoga techniques, and more specifically on meditation. As much as I could have had a judgmental look on those techniques a while ago, I am grateful for letting them into my life today.
Let go. It is all about letting go. Taking responsibility for your own actions, and letting go of everything you cannot have control on. Letting the things happen to you, and using the energies brought by them. Balancing, dancing if you prefer, between all life’s events, leading your way with good intentions. All energies and or emotions have a reason to be, and all of them can be managed and used. I am amazed with the power I gain over myself with simple meditation, twice a day. I do realize the real challenge will start in a few weeks, when I will have to make time and space for my practice. Intentions are nothing without dedication. Just as dedication gives dimension and power to any project.
Letting go. Of fears, to start with. Of controlling behaviors, to continue. Of self-judgment, as a bonus.
On land, I started this process with the meditation practice; and yoga postures I never dared to try before. I found myself today with my head on the floor, ass in the air, knees cuddling my chest. I remember being unable to do a simple cartwheel when I was at school, for I was too scared to lose balance and face if both my feet were not on the floor. High five with my 7 years old self.
Under water, not only I was spinning, swinging and dancing; but more importantly I was diving. With actual diving gears, totally immersed in water. I have always felt like a fish in water, for as long as I could keep my head up. Snorkeling was already stressful for I would need to submerge my head, therefore my eyes, therefore my contacts. I do realize I am wearing googles but I do not trust those things. In my mind, a drop of sea water magically turns into ocean wave once in my mask and before I know it my contacts would be gone and I would be blind. Yes, that quickly. But then I figured I have plenty of contacts with me, so if I lose one to the Bay of Thailand I might still survive. So I went diving. And I was so excited that I forgot to take my camera.
I am not sorry. Cameras and the opportunities to take pictures take your attention away from the experience. I am happy I went down there with my eyes, my fears, my beating heart and my wonderful master diver Celia.
Everything takes a bit more time under water. Reactions are delayed. But the peace and the love were instantaneous. It is another kind of silence, another dimension. Everything is open, accessible: this is the best playground I was ever invited into. The visibility is restricted to the mask, and I like to see it as a window. I am free to look all around but only one wonder at a time; it is like a forced focus. I experience it as a way to teach me a different approach to the world, to the way I look at things: one at a time, observe, enjoy, understand before eventually looking around. Everything is alive and works together; the undersea world is another facet to the planet we walk on. Mermaiding my way around corals, lover fish and colorful creatures, I follow the excited sign of Celia to find myself facing a blue dotted ray, getting cleaned by a bunch of tiny fish. Relaxed, laying in the soft white sand, the ray makes a spectacle of herself.
I come back to the surface after nearly an hour of pure bliss, with wide eyes and smile. I went back today to the same spot, but conquering the surface on a paddle board this time. Fighting to keep my balance between the waves, I played captain for a while. The view you get from the middle of a board, in the middle of the bay, in the middle of the ocean, in the middle of nowhere. I had the feeling for a minute to be very strong, standing proud on my board. I lied down there for a while, staring at the sky, floating. And I pictured myself from above; tiny sailor on the surface of the planet. And I was at peace. Because everything matters. The captain and the cabin boy; the splendid ray and the tiny cleaning fish; the swing on top of the mountain and the tanning spot on the (kind of) flat rock half way in the ocean; the chicken running free and the mango in the tree… really, everything matters. You just have to come to peace with who you are, and to acknowledge your strength so you can start taking actions and responsibilities in the world we live in. Any kind of world, any kind of cultures: pick one you like, on land or underwater; north or south, warm or cold. Pick one, take care of it, be a part of it and grow together.
Every things and every lives matter. The day we come to peace with this statement, Life for sure can only be better.